| Everything I ever needed to know I learned from my dog...
1. If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you'll get what you
want.
2. Don't go out without ID.
3. Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by pissing
on their shoes.
4. Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.
5. Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.
6. Always give people a friendly greeting. A cold nose in the crotch
is most effective.
7. When you do something wrong, always take responsibility (as soon
as you're dragged shamefully out from under the bed).
8. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss. |
